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    Entries in Machete don't cook (2)

    Tuesday
    Apr162013

    Soft and Sweet

    It's like Medusa lives in my baking cupboard.

    Brown sugar goes in and a solid lump comes out.

    No more! I've finally figured out the perfect way to keep even the darkest brown sugar from turning into a doorstop.

    So, we've all tried the zip bag, the "air tight" container, the freezer, putting a chunk of apple in with it, microwaving it, one of those weird round things you soak in water first...

    None of them work.

    I've been baking without brown sugar for years because I was tired of buying a bag, using a cup, and then chucking a solid block of sugar and buying a new bag a month later.

    But last month, I wanted to make pudding cake and I wasn't willing to risk the recipe with the wrong kind of sugar so I caved and bought a bag.

    And then stood in the kitchen staring at the open bag wondering how long it would be before I had to throw it out. I admit, I came close to tossing it right then and there. But I'm stubborn. I went to the bags-and-wraps drawer to get a zip bag, and saw the foil.

    Shiney.

    Well, it worked for guacamole...

    What the hell. It's worth a shot.

    So, I just twisted the top of the bag and creatively folded the foil until the whole thing was covered.

    Kinda shaped like a football, which is handy when you're so short that the best way to get stuff onto the top shelf of the cupboard is to chuck it.

    5'1" and I have a wicked free throw.

    Two weeks later I made brown sugar cookies with it.

    Today, I made muffins with it. (Lost track of time and burned them... now you know why you're getting just the tip)

    And I'm pretty sure that in two weeks when I get back from Recipe Guy's place, I'll be making muffins.

    Someone else really needs to try this so I know it wasn't some kind of weird fluke...

    Please?

    Tuesday
    Sep182012

    Once upon a time

    in Mexico.

    A dude named Roberto Rodriguez decided he wanted to make movies (okay, no, it wasn't Mexico, it was Texas, but that didn't work with the titles). And he made some awesome flicks. Low budget, strong characters, bizarre and yet entirely believable plotlines... including, in one, a scene in which one character kills another because he made his dinner too good.

    I'm not kidding.

    Killed him right there in the kitchen as he stood over the stove.

    Brilliant.

    Wanna know what he made?

    Puerco Pibil

    according to Roberto Rodruiguez (srsly, watch the video)

    What you need:

    • 5 tbsp annatto, aka achiote, seeds (or about 3 tbsp pre-ground, which is what I used)
    • 2 tsp cumin seeds
    • 1 tbsp peppercorns
    • 8 whole allspice seeds
    • 1/2 tsp whole cloves
    • 2 hatch, anaheim, or poblano chiles (or habanero if you're feeling spicy)
    • 1/2 cup orange juice
    • 1/4 cup white vinegar
    • 1/4 c white wine vinegar
    • 1 tsp salt
    • 8 cloves garlic
    • juice of 4 limes (or lemons, or some combination thereof)
    • 2 oz tequila (or jalapeno wine, or some other booze that you like to have with mexican food)
    • 5 lb of pork butt (also known as shoulder)

    What you gotta do:

    Grind the spices in a coffee grinder, or do it old school in a mortar and pestle.

    Combine everything else, except the pork, in the food processor and whiz until it's nice and liquidy. No chunks allowed!

    Dump the ground up spices into the food processor and use it to mix them in. Annatto is one of those fabulous spices that's often used as a natural food colour. The Kashi granola bars I bought last week have "annatto colour" listed as the last ingredient. And holy crap, no kidding. This dish would just not be the same without it.

    Okay, so, I left out the lime juice so I could get a nice pic of something being poured into something else. This recipe is apparently a little too easy. I had to add steps so I could make food porn.

    Chop the butt into 1-2 inch chunks. You can trim some of the fat from the meat if you want to, but you don't have to.

    Mix the pork butt into the fabulous saucey marinade.

    Um, there wasn't room in the fridge for the giant bowl, so I transferred everything to a 9 x 13 pan. You're going to cook the whole thing, marinade and all, so you may as well let it marinate in that pan.

    Let the pork marinate for at least a few hours or as much as a whole day. This is one of those dishes you can put together at night, and toss into the crock pot in the morning. In fact, I think next time I make it, I'll use the crock pot just to prove it.

    If you really want to, you can line your baking dish with banana leaves first. If you can find them. Mine were in the frozen section, but if your regular grocery doesn't have them, try an Asian market. Apparently they can be plentiful in groceries that specialize in Thai food...

    I didn't do the leaf thing. I just covered mine completely and tightly with a double layer of heavy duty foil. You want to keep as much moisture in as possible. You aren't roasting so much as you are stewing in the oven.

    After about 4 hours at 250F it's absolutely fork tender. Falls apart when you try to stab it.

    Now, if you can resist temptation, let this sit in the fridge overnight again.

    Apparently, there are people in Recipe Guy's house who can't resist temptation.

    Shred the meat with a couple forks and stir it into the fabulous spiced juices.

    Serve over rice, and top with tomatoes and cilantro.

    What movie recipe would you like to see made??